"Don't be afraid, it's only me"

Last night kippers and I went to see comedian Sean Lock at my local theatre. He was brilliant, by the way (that's Lock, not kippers!). Also attending was an actor who has appeared in many British comedy shows who happens to live in the same town as me. (He was particularly ace in Look Around You.)

Today, on the way home from seeing kippers to the station, I found myself shambling down the pavement behind said local actor and I would like to say the following:

Dear Michael Fenton Stevens,

I am not stalking you. To show how nice and non-stalky I am, here are four great songs about stalking, all available for 7 days, so we can laugh off our humourous misunderstanding. Please don't take me to court.

Cancel The Astronauts - I Am The President Of Your Fanclub (And Last Night I Followed You Home) mp3 (artist website) (This really is a corking song. If you only download one song today, I'd like it to be this one.)

Hello Saferide - Highschool Stalker mp3 (artist website)

Liechtenstein - Stalking Skills mp3 (right click) (artist website)

David Bowie - Love You Til Tuesday mp3 (artist website) (I love the way he laughs at the absurdity of rhyming branch - said the southern way - with romance during this song.)

You can buy music by the mentioned artists here, here and here.

Yours sincerely,

Spike