The above photo has to be one of my favourite things in the world at the moment. It's taken from the back cover of the autumn programme of events for a local theatre in the south east of England. The people in the picture are the staff of the marketing agency (let's call them
Marketing Tools) who are the main sponsors of the theatre in question.
So far so humdrum. But what is it about the picture that has me so enthralled? Could it be the toothsome trio at the front (let's call them Binky, Toby and Mufty)? Nope. It is, obviously, the magnificent, brooding presence of the bloke (let's call him Ron) standing to the rear of the pic behind Toby and Mufty. What a guy!
It's not difficult to imagine the thought process of the photographer (let's call them the photographer) and how he or she would have had to employ all his or her diplomatic skills in arranging the various employees of
Marketing Tools into an acceptable formation for the snap...
"OK, guys, let's have you in a little semi-circle at the front, big smiles.... not you Ron. I'll come to you in a minute. Binky, could you undo your top button and thrust your chest out a bit? Lovely. Arms rounds the girls please, Tobes. Maybe if you could undo your top button too, show a bit of chest hair. The ladies'll love that. And Mufty, what can I say - you're gorgeous!
Now... Ron. If you could just move back a bit.... and a bit more. Bit more, love. And a bit more. To the right a bit as well please Ronnie... no, my right. And a bit more. Actually maybe it'd be better if you didn't smile - y'know, give the whole thing a bit of contrast. And perhaps you could pop these shades on as well. That's it. Now, everyone say 'cheese'!
Not you Ron."My co-blogger Spike even has a theory that Binky, Toby and Mufty aren't actually employees of
Marketing Tools at all, but are instead models drafted in for the photo opportunity to make the agency appear more glamorous and, well, less of a one-man (ie Ron) band. She's such a cynic, that girl!
Anyway, this song sums Ron up nicely I think.
Elias & The Wizzkids - Young and Hairy mp3 (top-notch Swedish indie pop)
Buy Elias & The Wizzkids stuff
