Crushed by the wheels of industry

Cripes, just discovered I missed out on the release of a new I, Ludicrous single in September. Strange really as I'm sure it would've been record of the week on all the major music networks. Ho ho ho. Here it is anyway, and just in time for the new working week: Clerking Til I Die.



Download it here

We'll support you ever more

Top-notch pop news ahoy. The legendary I, Ludicrous have only gone and released a brand new download single. We're The Support Band (a new recording of an old favourite) is available from itunes and all the usual online suspects. Here's the FAB promo video!

Hair today

Watching wacky magician Paul Zenon (right) sitting in Dictionary Corner on Countdown today, it struck me that an awful lot of men in his game have ridiculous facial hair. I've no idea why this should be the case though.

I mean, it's not as if people in other occupations have unique identifying features or quirks of style of their own, that set them apart from people outside their area of expertise.

For example, you don't see loads of school dinner ladies walking about sporting bright green mohicans, or scores of dustmen doing their rounds favouring Su Pollard-style giant red specs and furry dice earrings.*

And you'd never get a multitude of barristers in the courtrooms of Britain and the Commonwealth going about their business dressed in ridiculous horsehair wigs that make them look more like members of the French nobility from hundreds of years ago than actual high profile members of the modern-day legal profession, would you?

Oh, wait.

But anyway, the question still remains: why do illusionists favour stupid tiny beards and pointy sideburns that practically meet in the middle? It can't merely be because they're a bunch of pretentious wazzocks who spend far too much time admiring themselves in the mirror and trying to perfect their oh-look-at-me-aren't-I-all-mysterious-and-slightly-otherworldly look, can it?

Oh, wait. Again.

Talking of TV personalities with annoying facial hair...

I, Ludicrous - Stuck In A Lift With Noel Edmonds mp3 (for 7 days)

*I can't help thinking the world would be a slightly better place if you did though.

Buy I Ludicrous's 20 Years In Show Business here. (It's brilliant, by the way; and it's only £4.99 for the 34-track double CD.)

Inverurie once played Airdrie in the Cup

You know how every now and then a song comes along that you just can't stop listening to? Something you have to keep playing again and again because of its sheer, ineffable wondrousness? Well one such instant classic has entered my consciousness in the past 24 hours - a song which I'm certain is going to remain a favourite of mine for, well, until such time as I pop my clogs, really.

It has everything the discerning comedy pop fan could want: a rousing, singalong chorus; some poorly impersonated Scottish accents (and one real one); bits of a classified Pools check; and even a mention of curling! What more could you possibly ask for?

The track in question - The Highland League - is from blog favourites I, Ludicrous, and, rather thrillingly, is from their brand new (well, actually two months old, but new by my standards) Dirty Washing CD, which can be bought, along with other fantastic I, Ludicrous merchandise, for a trifling £5 direct from the band's official website. I'd strongly recommend you do exactly this, anyway, as the CD is full to bursting with acerbic pop gems.

Here's a full track listing:

1. Argument in the Laundrette
2. The Highland League
3. The Ruby Wax Song
4. Chav It Up With Jeremy Kyle
5. Finding Things Out About John

You really haven't lived until you've heard Chav It Up With Jeremy Kyle!

But anyway, yes, on to the matter in hand. You can keep your namby pamby lowland leagues, here - strictly for one week only - is I, Ludicrous' anthemic tribute to the one and only Highland League. Och aye!

I, Ludicrous - The Highland League mp3 (available for 7 days)

Listen to more I, Ludicrous gems on the band's MySpace page.

Ludicrously good

I've been listening to popular music combo I, Ludicrous's double best of album 20 Years In Showbusiness a lot over the past few months - and guess what? It's dead good. For anyone not yet acquainted with this band, the easiest way to describe them would be as a sort of southern equivalent of Half Man Half Biscuit. Which is, clearly, a very good thing.

I, Ludicrous were formed in London in 1985 by John Procter and David Rippingale (AKA Will Hung), and soon pulled off the impressive feat of reaching #11 in John Peel's Festive Fifty with their debut flexi release Preposterous Tales. In the intervening two decades, they've released several albums and singles - gathering a loyal cult following along the way - and now, in 2007, they've packaged 34 of the best tracks from these releases together on one shiny, double album - the aforementioned 20 Years In Showbusiness.



20 Years contains some of the funniest lyrical observations around on contemporary* British culture, on subjects ranging from legendary Spitting Image puppet and sometime sports anchor, David Coleman (Quite Extraordinary), to ill-starred, naff soap operas ( Hats Off To Eldorado); from annoying former Thatcherite Sports Miniatures (sic) (Moynihan Brings Out The Hooligan In Me) to the nightmare scenario of being trapped in an elevator with a beardy, grating TV personality ( Stuck In A Lift With Noel Edmonds). There's even a song about the band's guru - him from The Fall (I've Never Been Hit By Mark E. Smith).

*well, a lot of these songs were written in the 80s and early 90s, but obviously they'd have been contemporary at the time.

Here are a couple of my favourite tracks, anyway. Have a listen and see what you think.

I, Ludicrous - Preposterous Tales mp3 (left click - up for 7 days)

I, Ludicrous - Quite Extraordinary mp3 (ditto)

20 Years In Showbusiness is available from Play.com for £10.99, or for a bargain £10.98 from Amazon. (but if you really shop around you might even be able to pick up a copy for £10.97 - who knows??)

Seriously, this album is great value for money and a cracking listen to boot. Highly recommended!

The I, Ludicrous website

Aye, ludicrous

Overheard on BBC One's National Lottery Jet Set quiz this evening:

Eamonn Holmes: Who wrote The Strange Case of Doctor Jekyll & Mr Hyde?

Middle-aged contestant bloke: Sherlock Holmes?

Give me strength!

(In the circumstances, I should probably include a track by Simple Minds here, but I've had Preposterous Tales by I, Ludicrous swishing around in my head all day so you're going to have to settle for that I'm afraid! Just as well it's a great song really!)

I, Ludicrous - Preposterous Tales mp3 (available for seven days)

I, Ludicrous's official website